D u b o s e' favorite dance picture
One of our many sing-alongs this one at Frank's house with from left to right Lynn, Frank, Dubose and Chris at right
Dubose birthday May 2025 at Reve Reataurant
Play anniversary waltz on accordion and then video with Lawrence welk or somebody dancing The waltz
Danny and the Juniors
Order 45s of quando quando quando for rumba and boy from New York City for swing And everybody likes to cha cha cha for cha cha
And dick contino for polka or Lawrence welk
And Chevy checker for the twist if I don't have that
And the stroll
And sway for cha cha and rumba
Unchained Melody or Moon River for waltz or anniversary Watts
What is the most popular swing tune of all time?
The 50 Best Swing Songs Ever
Sing, Sing, Sing. Benny Goodman.
Begin the Beguine. Artie Shaw.
In the Mood. Glenn Miller.
Chattanooga Choo-Choo. Glenn Miller Orchestra.
I'll Never Smile Again. Frank Sinatra, Tommy Dorsey.
Mack the Knife. Louis Armstrong.
Bei Mir Bist Du Schon. The Andrews Sisters.
A String of Pearls. Glenn Miller.
More items...
Best songs for rumba dance
Save the last dance for me
Something" by The Beatles
"Slow Ride" by Foghat
"Can't Help Falling in Love" by Elvis Presley
"Unchained Melody" by The Righteous Brothers
Find a good video of anniversary Watts with dancing to put on video and learn to play my accordion along to that in the same key
***,
Dubose fave dance picture , from SF Open 2024
Dubose's last birthday, at Reve with Chris
Silver bells original
https://youtu.be/UNwGVgfkcgI?si=714xVQwDRcGPFfqQ
Boy from New York City
https://youtu.be/k2fN36wq-zc?si=Mo_OQKCoo9ixZmcr
Singalong with Darlene Love - Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) (Official Lyric Video) https://youtube.com/watch?v=HseSJqCjlR8&si=1z4BF6UTg_KFoFjl
Quando quando Tony Renis
https://youtube.com/shorts/H8FBtSjADRs?si=eR1D8tzljs0pcaXw
Rocking around the Christmas treeRocking around the Christmas tree
Https://youtu.be/5TYtvxUGfbw?si=uKmOBzKYMZyzqAWW
Dances of the 60s
https://youtu.be/jWUJ0eE6ugs?si=fmILGZlk5aaR5uFy
Actual
https://youtu.be/TZdvihA7Y1A?si=cgqdvYOptf-LdDpn
Anni iversary waltz - Lawrence welk
https://youtu.be/LCr0o7cjRU4?si=deADlQqIBeNTnH2s
https://youtu.be/TZdvihA7Y1A?si=cgqdvYOptf-LdDpn
Everybody likes to cha cha cha with Sam Cooke and Jackie Wilson
https://youtu.be/dT5RppqL6vw?si=4wdQrNXH_OLn1fWv
Christmas Darlene Love
https://youtu.be/3s0ES8L51BQ?si=vA16JjWwkoHhdhqd
At the Hop - Danny and Juniors
https://youtu.be/E8v4awVdXqQ?si=Mm19dwDHStpNF-1z
https://youtu.be/E8v4awVdXqQ?si=Mm19dwDHStpNF-1z
Rock and Roll is here to Stay
It's now or never Elvis E -F#m-B7 Am E-B7-E
https://youtu.be/l6Xf-AklItM?si=RxJarQ3NAp3iT9L-
Blue Moon -Elvis slow version G Em C D7
https://youtu.be/1DwopLE71k4?si=A-2x0_nOJ81XIKCi
https://youtu.be/MDh8GmSZk34?si=hFTxLIp3Gl4QhjgX
Blue Moon uptempo Marcels Shanana
G Em C D7
https://youtu.be/lo8YyLLGgWs?si=Y4GnwuFdT_Vqp5Ix
Sing along
The carnival is over Dubose's favorite song, by The Seekers
The Carnival Is Over: The Seekers
#1 in Australia & UK in 1965
Capo 2nd fret
[Verse 1]
G C G
Say goodbye, my own true lover
G7 C C7
As we sing a lover's song
F C Am
How it breaks my heart to leave you
F G G7
Now the carnival is gone
[Verse 2]
C G
High above, the dawn is waking
G7 C C7
And my tears are falling rain
F C Am
For the carnival is over
F C C7
We may never meet again
[Chorus]
F G C Am
Like a drum, my heart was beating
F G Em
And your kiss, was sweet as wine
F G Em Am
But the joys, of love are fleeting
F Bb G
For Pierrot and Columbine
[Verse 3]
C G
Now the harbour light is calling
G7 C C7
This will be our last goodbye
F C Am
Though the carnival is over
F G C C7
I will love you till I die
[Chorus]
F G C Am
Like a drum, my heart was beating
F G Em
And your kiss, was sweet as wine
F G Em Am
But the joys, of love are fleeting
F Bb G
For Pierrot and Columbine
[Verse 4]
C G
Now the harbour light is calling
G7 C C7
This will be our last goodbye
F C Am
Though the carnival is over
F G C C7
I will love you till I die
[Outro]
F C Am
Though the carnival is over
F G G7 C
I will love you, till I die
And or
World of our Own, Dubose's second favorite song
A World Of Our Own chords
The Seekers 1965
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_World_of_Our_Own
Capo III *
G C 4x
G Bm
Close the doors, light the lights,
C G
we're stayin' home tonight;
Em Bm C D
far away from the bustle and the bright city lights.
G Bm
Let them all fade away,
C G
just leave us alone;
Bm C G G C G C
and we'll live in a world of our own.
G C
We'll build a world of our own,
G Em
that no one else can share.
G Em D
All our sorrows we'll leave, far behind us there.
G Bm
And I know you will find,
C G
there'll be peace of mind;
Bm C G G C G C
when we live in a world of our own.
G Bm
Oh my love, oh my love,
C G
I cried for you so much;
Em Bm C D
lonely nights without sleeping, while I longed for your touch.
G Bm
Now your lips can erase,
C G
the heartache I've known;
Bm C G G C G C
come with me to a world of our own.
G C
We'll build a world of our own,
G Em
that no one else can share.
G Em D
All our sorrows we'll leave, far behind us there.
G Bm
And I know you will find,
C G
there'll be peace of mind;
Bm C G G C
when we live in a world of our own.
G Bm
And I know you will find,
C G
there'll be peace of mind;
Bm C G G C
when we live in a world of our own.
(musical interlude) G C G C
G C
We'll build a world of our own,
G Em
that no one else can share.
G Em D
All our sorrows we'll leave, far behind us there.
G Bm
And I know you will find,
C G
there'll be peace of mind;
Bm C G G C
when we live in a world of our own.
G Bm
And I know you will find,
C G
there'll be peace of mind;
Bm C G G C G C G
when we live in a world of our own.
Alternate:
Capo I
G = A
C = D
Bm = C#m
Em = F#m
D = E
Set8
I'll never find another you Seekers
I'll Never Find Another You - The Seekers
Capo III (original key = Bb)
e|----------------------------|
B|-------3-1-0----------------|
G|0----4-------2--------------|
D|---------------0------0-2-4-|
A|----------------------------|
E|----------------------------|
[Intro]
G C D x4
G C A7 D7
There's a new world somewhere, they call the promised land,
G Bm C D
And I'll be there someday, if you will hold my hand.
Em C D C Bm
I still need you there beside me, no matter what I do,
C G C Am D G C D
For I know I'll never find another you.
G C A7 D7
There is always someone for each of us they say,
G Bm C D
And you'll be my someone forever and a day.
Em C D C Bm
I could search the whole world over, until my life is through
C G C Am D G C G
But I know I'll never find another you.
D Em C G C G
It's a long, long, journey, so stay by my side.
G/F# Em D C G C D7
When I walk through the storm you'll be my guide, be my guide
G C A7 D7
If they gave me a fortune, my pleasure would be small,
G Bm C D
I could lose it all tomorrow, and never mind at all.
Em C D C Bm
But if I should lose your love, dear, I don't know what I'd do,
C G Em C D7 G C D
For I know I'll never find another you.
G C A7 D7 G Bm C D
Em C D C Bm
But if I should lose your love, dear, I don't know what I'd do,
C G C Am D7 G C D
For I know I'll never find another you.
G C D7
Another you . . .
G C G
Another you
I Wonder Why -Dion bflat eflat F7
https://youtu.be/ONAtogPBU3U?si=9lBE0ZmEGlcAG9Ar
https://youtu.be/p1tSbPwGuXA?si=u7Uk8do35RAG9HSj
The End
Including Lawrence welk introducing polka dance, the stroll and a mixture of fast and slow and fast songs, maybe play anniversary walls on the accordion followed by Al jolson's version on screen if I'm brave enough
P Plus other dances live on screen and then a few sing-alongs after that and more pictures of to both filtered in including her dance picture she sent me maybe that should go at the beginning
###
Opening
Dubose tribute
People ask 'How would you describe Dubose in one word'. Of course one word is not enough to describe this dynamic, one of a kind personality but words like down to earth, no drama, unpretentious, full of life and exceptionally kind come to mind, among others. It would be unfair to describe such an eclectic person in only one word. How's about a couple thousand words?. Here goes ...
.OPENING talk- card
I've lived in Lafayette 25 years but yet have really not made any good friends in this town because I don't fit in, being single without kids and a independent thinker, if you will.
So I decided it was time to give it a real go and I went and went beyond my 'normal':to arrange a meetup group to play and sing music while, hopefully , making new like-minded friends. . But I was interesting sharing my muaic passion .
I remember clear as day A friendly man and woman lugging a very heavy keyboard to my yard looking to plug into. In the a few other people that show up but it was these two that definitely stood out in the crowd. Well I need a group disintegrated I would remain friends and become very good friends with you both and Chris and we continue our sing-alongs mostly at their house plus engagement all kinds of activities for y'all love and have in common.
People have asked how would I describe Dubose in one word. Some say dynamic. Some say unique. It's hard to put it all into one word but I would say refreshing. Dubose is like a breath of fresh air in a sea of polluted conformists.
When someone passes away these days it seems like that person is too quickly forgotten. I don't know what it is if people are a fear afraid of death or simply don't want to deal with it, but I will never forget Dubose and. In fact I will celebrate her everyday. Not only was she a special person but she changed my life. She opened up a whole new phase of life really these past few years.
When someone passes away these days it seems like that person is too quickly forgotten. I don't know what it is if people are a fear afraid of death or simply don't want to deal with it, but I will never forget Dubose and. In fact I will celebrate her everyday. Not only was she a special person but she changed my life. She opened up a whole new phase of life really these past few years.
I never expected to meet a friend like her, especially in Lafayette where people seem to be more closed and into their own families and stuff. Well do both was into her family but she was also into friendships and having fun and living life ,not just going through the motions. And like other friends I have I've had she was a real true friend who showed she cared about me even ahead of yourself and always thought of me when there was some activity or something of interest. I miss her almost daily calls or texts
And a person so full of life. It's still hard to believe she's not here but she is here. I feel her presence every day as I believe do her other friends to whom she introduced me to and who Will continue to carry on the fun experiences with Dubose in all of our hearts as if she's there with us. And again, she is with us. When I don't hear from her or other friends I never did hear from much I will imagine hearing from her and which he might have to say on a subject or imagine what activities she would want to do next and I will do those with Dubose in mind
With many people there's only so much about whichI could say when they pass away but with Dubose I could go on and on and write a book and maybe I should. She had quite a story and she shared with me quite a bit And I'm glad she did because that's how I really got to know her as a person and know what similarities we had and why I related her so much .
So the adventure will go on which of us always in our hearts. Did I think I'll skip the Elvis impersonator annual coming up in December because I don't want to share do both with my other 'outside' friends who will want to go. That was our special or one of our very special moments when we first discovered that event the first year and then continued on for a second year. It was more fun with just the three of us with Dubose and Chris. And I'll always keep that memory of one of the funnest times we had thanks to do those first discovering that event and then sharing it with us. Just one of so many good times we had together.
I never expected to meet a friend like her, especially in Lafayette where people seem to be more closed and into their own families and stuff. Well do both was into her family but she was also into friendships and having fun and living life ,not just going through the motions. And like other friends I have I've had she was a real true friend who showed she cared about me even ahead of yourself and always thought of me when there was some activity or something of interest. I miss her almost daily calls or texts
And a person so full of life. It's still hard to believe she's not here but she is here. I feel her presence every day as I believe do her other friends to whom she introduced me to and who Will continue to carry on the fun experiences with Dubose in all of our hearts as if she's there with us. And again, she is with us. When I don't hear from her or other friends I never did hear from much I will imagine hearing from her and which he might have to say on a subject or imagine what activities she would want to do next and I will do those with Dubose in mind
Dubose told me on numerous occasions that she didn't expect to live out a full long life and that she would pass In her mid '70s as her mother did.
Of course, I questioned this. In any case, with this belief in mind, Dubose lived her life with abandon, not wasting precious moments and living a full life between grandmother and dancer and singer and you name it. Dubose squeezed in more in her shortened life then most so in their longer lives. She had a law degree, too!
I always tried to live life fully but seeing Dubose REALLY do it stepped up my game. And now with Dubose's inspiration I'm doing things I wouldn't have considered months ago. I had turned down Dubose' invites to join her and Chris at various dances. Now Today I'm taking dance lessons, only now discovering what I missed with Dubose and now making up for lost time thanks to our new friend, Jackie. I now see why Dubose enjoyed dance so much. What better way to get the adrenaline going in a creative way, hear some good music and meet new-and old- friends . And dance was just one of many things Dubose inspired in me . I will always think of Dubose when I'm out there on the dance floor. Dubose will always be a part of me.
Nothing stopped Dubose, not even illness. And I guess if there's a silver lining, In later years Dubose was finally mostly able to do things her way with obvious enjoyment. She went out Knowing that she had checked all the boxes: Wonderful grandmother and friend , devoted guardian of her many pets over the years, world traveler, pro dancer and musician, and singer. I could go on. And everything she did Dubose did it well. One of the things I like best about Dubose is that she didn't follow the latest trends. She rarely watched TV or the latest reality tv series. She went to bed early and was up early walking her dogs and enjoying the sunrises-Even a little too early for me though I did manage a few 6 am Reservoir walks with Dubose, Chris and dogs. I was actually able to keep up with them, somehow. But I'm working on more 6 ams. Again, Dubose was an inspiration for me and is an inspiration for me as this late night owl has become a morning person and getting a lot more out of each day since I've known Dubose.
Random note
I'm amazed that Dubose could have the wear with all to call all her friends and even her acquaintances after she got the ultimate bad news. I know at least two friends she called -one good friend and one fairly new acquaintance and they both told me she told them the honest news of what was happening as well as thanked them for their friendship in nearly hour conversations, if you can imagine that. Here you have one on her deathbed, if you will, thinking more of others than herself. I don't think I could have summoned up the strength to do anything close. Imagine asking me if I wanted to speak at her celebration of life. She did that too. Incredible
###
BLUE COLLAR GUY In a white collar town- I've lived in Lafayette now over 25 years and a few years ago I thought it was time to really make an effort to not only fulfill my music passion but also make a few new local friends in my town of largely affluent, family folks who mostly stay to themselves or their cliques. So, following Covid era, I started a 'meetup' group to play and sing music . I can remember the day Dubose and Chris, her husband , came over, lugging a heavy keyboard to my backyard ' sing-along ' event. This would be the beginning of a great friendship.. with lots of fun singing, dancing, dining, etc. -now memories. I do still keep in touch with Chris and will be going to a 'Mardi gras' music and dance event next month in Fresno, where Chris now lives.
Well, l was more ' blue collar' than Dubose , who was collar-less. Dubose was an extremely kind, unpretentious and adventurous kindred spirit with a child-like innocence but yet strong in a gentle way - with whom I had much in common. We both agreed that we were both living out as adults our childhoods that were short -circuited back in the day for various reasons. Whether it was at an oldies concert or new (e.g. Dylan) movie, dance or a potluck / sing-along , celebrating our birthdays or celebrating New Years with a blind fold champagne tasting or a rock and roll revival at Rossmoor last New Year's eve We did it all- and often. These last few years for me have been as good as any in memory, thanks to my newfound friendship with Dubose and Chris, who helped open a new fun, adventurous chapter in my life.
So, today I can't help but live my life with Dubose and Snowy coming along in spirit , likewise Joan and Don in my heart and mind.
Another old expression is 'out of bad comes good' or something like that ( stated in a fancier way. ) I had watched Dubose actually prepare for her demise, though we wouldn't expect it to be so soon. She had everything prepared in a book called, ' I'm dead and here's what to do' or words to that effect. Yes, it may sound a bit morbid but Dubose made her plans like we all should do but don't follow through when we get to certain ages. And while making the transition easier for her family, she's inspired me to do the same , so , getting to the good news ... I've gotten rid of a lot of stuff I hadn't used in years - and had my first house deep cleaning in years with some great professionals who recently also deep cleaned my old office, which I decided to rent out-another big life change this year.
Half Glass Full - Through Dubose I've met several new friends including Jackie and Frank ,and, of course Chris. Somehow Dubose is always there with us, even all the way down in Fresno where she'll be 'with us' in February.
And so we were living out our childhoods as adults, we both agreed. And part of the reason for the commonality in our friendship.
Ending of talk
In a world of generics. copycats and phone followers , Dubose was an original, one of a kind. I know no others in our age group so full of life and energy as DUBOSE exhibited up until the last few months. She thought I had energy. No, it was Dubose who did those 3 mile morning fast walks around the reservoir, drove miles to get her grandkids where they needed to go while their parents were working. So it is shocking and so sad to have such a vibrant, young personality taken from us So quickly and painfully. Some things are hard to explain but I try to get some solace Knowing that Dubose lived life to the fullest most of the time - even when she wasn't feeling well she'd be out at a Merry mixer dance or singalong. When she got sick she hated being in the hospital and I think I told the story of her pleading to be let out of the hospital and walking home on her own. Dubose was something else. Her determination was amazing, like hanging on well past her " expiration date ' if you will, doctors gave her--long enough to see her new grandson born the day before she passed. Dubose made that happen where the average person would have given up much earlier any such expectations.
Dubose lives on for me, still and will always be inspiring many of my daily actions. If Dubose were here she would be surprised to learn that this long time non-dancer is now taking dancing lessons and enjoying them, thanks to her inspiration and a little help from her friend , aforementioned Jackie And that's another thing. Dubose had some very nice friends. If they were her good friends I knew I would like them-And that's another thing. I can thank Dubose for a number of new friendships in recent years. And , as mentioned , finding my kind of people in Lafayette isn't so easy., As much as I miss Dubose I still have those mutual friends through which Dubose lives on, too. And When we go out to do things we talk about and with Dubose, as it were, so Dubose is still with us in many ways.
Duboses enthusiasm was addicting. She would call sometimes 2 hours before an event and say ;hey Bert, you want to go see the Everly Brothers TRIBUTE band and Rossmoor? or,
Do you want to go to Ashkenaz to see and dance with Tom Rigney, her favorite, or perhaps Mitch polzak, my new favorite. I knew she went overboard trying to be a great grandma of many grandchildren while also trying to live her own life doing the things she never got to do growing up, much like my self. You know she never went to a rock concert until she was well into her adult years, just as I didn't attend one until I was in my 20s. It was hard to say no when she would call, even right before the event. If I was around the area I usually said yes, other than the dancing, which I didn't feel accomplished at and was afraid Id embarrass myself
I May not have been at my best when she called but going out with Dubose and Chris would certainly pick up my mood and energy time and again. So , now I'm finding out why dancing was so integral to Dubose's life and as it is now becoming a part of mine. I only knew Duboce a few short years but I am pretty sure they were the best years of my life, finding that rare kindred spirit in Dubose + and Chris, too. It's still hard to believe Dubose is gone. It's true that the good often die young. I saw the same thing in my late sister, Joan , who was much like Dubose, with the difficult, repressed childhood and early adulthood. I miss Dubose very much and think of her often but just remembering that warm, happy , smiling visage somehow keeps her alive and has encouraged me, after a period of grieving, to go out and push the envelope and make things happen as Dubose would have done and would want me to do. Thank you Dubose. I cannot thank you enough for what you mean to me, what brought into my life and continue to bring.
###
I know I'm going on a long time and I apologize. I'm not a big public speaker but I t hought it important
to do my part in giving Dubose a fine sendoff while imparting to those who may not have known her well a better understanding of just how special a person she was and is , as she remains so much a part of many of us. I don't want to leave anyhthing out, but I'm afraid I will lhave to or I could be up here for hours and I Know you all have lives to live.
When someone passes away these days it seems like often that person is too quickly forgotten. I don't know what it is if people are afraid of death or simply don't want to deal with it, but I will never forget Dubose and. In fact I will celebrate her everyday. Not only was she a special person but she changed my life.
I never expected to meet a friend like her, especially in Lafayette where people seem to be more closed and into their own families and stuff. Well Dubose was into her family but she was also into friendships and having fun and living life ,not just going through the motions and slowing down in front of a TV just because she had reached a certain age. And like other friends I have I've had she was a real true friend who showed she cared about me even ahead of herself and always thought of me when there was some activity or something of interest. I miss her almost -daily calls or texts
And a person so full of life. It's still hard to believe she's not here but she is here. I feel her presence every day as I believe do her other good friends to whom she introduced me and who Will continue to carry on the fun experiences with Dubose in all of our hearts as if she's there with us. And again, she is with us.
With many people there's only so much about which I could say when they pass away but with Dubose I could go on and on and write a book and maybe I should. She had quite a story and she shared with me quite a bit And I'm glad she did because that's how I really got to know her as a person and know what similarities we had and why I related her so much .
So the adventure will go on with Dubose always in our hearts, bodies and souls. Did I think I'll skip the Elvis impersonator annual coming up in December because I don't want to share do both with my other 'outside' friends who will want to go. That was our special or one of our very special moments when we first discovered that event the first year and then continued on for a second year. It was more fun with just the three of us with Dubose and Chris. And I'll always keep that memory of one of the funnest times we had thanks to do those first discovering that event and then sharing it with us. Just one of so many good times we had together.
Final final
New opening
Do both was as fine a friend for whom a person could ask. I only knew Dubose for a few short years but those were probably the best years of my life
In our world today old-fashioned values and neighborly ways seem to be in short supply.
I've lived in Lafayette for over 25 years. It's a nice town but one where sidewalks aren't necessary because affluent people often are hidden behind gates. You rarely see kids outside playing games or their parents coming over to share recipes food or have friendly exchanges with their neighbors like I remember growing up as a kid in Oakland.
After 25 years living in Lafayette with little to show on the social side I decided if they weren't going to reach out I was going to reach out, perhaps to find somebody to share my music passion. So I started a meetup group to sing and play music I grew up with .
Not a lot of response to my first and following backyard meetups though two people stood out. Those would be Dubose and Chris who I remember is clear stay lugging a heavy keyboard from their car into my backyard Tiki garden as I call it. And we became fast friends. We like the same music had a similar temperament and enjoyed each other's company. Can't say so much for others that attended the meet up except for Frank who also became a good friend And knew and appreciates dubose before I did. I only had about three or four meetup sessions that other folks came and went frankly with nothing gained or nothing lost.
We seem to have the best time just ourselves and sometimes with Frank playing and singng music , you both sign keyboards and my cell phone ukulele or accordion and sometimes and Frank came he would play guitar.
From our get together s or sing-alongs as we call them, dubose was inspired to startup her old sing-alongs at her house that she had done previously for 10 years but stopped due to personality clashes. So those monthly sessions were ok for a few months but then we decided we had more enjoyment just having our own mini group sing-alongs with three or four or five people. And we continue these off and on health permitting by all parties. I had my own finger issue for over a year as Did Dubose but we were still able to at least sing if not play-0 As well as do a lot of other activities together.
The one thing I regret is I never really took up debosis offer to the company them to dances. I felt they were so advanced for me though I did go to a few music events like at ashkenaz where I did make an effort.
That I am happy to say that I am now taking dance lessons following devices inspiration and I'm finding out why she so much loved her dancing. It's a great not only a great social outlet but excellent exercise and you get to hear some good music at the same time
Thanks to Jackie and Chris when I see him I'm It's almost like deposis here in many ways and I'm going to the events with her spirit in tow
Ending
Unaccomplished as I am At public speaking I will keep this short though I could share thoughts about Dubose all day and would be happy to. But I am a More of a writer and have composed some more in-depth thoughts about my time knowing Dubose then I'm happy to share if anybody wants a copy.
Besides nobody could do Dubose justice in a 5-minute rememberance.
More closing thoughts
It really hit me how very special a person duboae was after we lost her. I I knew how much she meant to me And how having her as a friend sort of recharged my life thhese last few years but when the almost daily interesting messages and phone calls stopped there was nothing to replace them and the person behind those messages. I was lucky to meet a lot of nice people through Dubose but she was ateast a step or two above all of us in her kindneaa, giving , spirit, honesty, common sense and dynamicism. We're lucky if we meet one person in a lifetime like a Dubose. So I will hang on to the many memories and what I learned through her that are now a part of MY life.
I do have to Tell a little anecdote that could only happen with Dubose. A few days after she passed I was really feeling bad, of course, missing her along with her communication which she kept up until her very last day. The you convinced in person the last weeks
Dubose was able to summon up enough energy and desire to mostly text and even make a few calls. Then there was silence
As I was missing her loyal frequent communication about 3 days after she left us I received this text message from Dubose and I said to myself 'how could this be.' this was too exciting. I'm not sure I believe in messages from the grave. From the best I can figure after talking to Blake or Louise It was some unseen photos she had scheduled perhaps it's a final 'goodbye' to send me from my birthday celebration in April with a generous one word caption, 'virtuoso' or maestro or something like that that escapes me right now.
That this last text from her which I had firar was from Louise or Blake who had Dubose phone but ,no, it was her as only Dubose would do something like this. And it made my day and week and month. But that was typical Duboae , special person that she was and is, coming up with special things and special moments to share..and
There were a lot of them.
So I miss the last minute calls 'hey burr, theres is a concert dance over at the event Center or there's a sing-along at the lqmorinda village or let's have our own sing-along tonight
Or 'we're taking you for your birthday . can you be ready in an hour. ?'
And of course I said yes to most of those things and tred to extend a few offers myself which we duboae and chrisusually took me up on.
By the way Dubose is a great baker ams cook as many of you know and she would always have wonderful treats for us when we would do our sing-alongs or get togethers. So there's a lot to miss but I am lucky I got 4 years worth p of good times in the other memories I wouldn't have had otherwise that I not extended myself with my own neetup where I met her.
So I guess the number on thing I learned from dubose is to seize the day or caepwt diem and do it down and don't put off for tomorrow would you do today and extend yourself a bit cuz you might not be here tomorrow. No doubt that was lurking in the back of Dubose mind these last years and fortunately she was able to pack in a lot into a shortened life And I was so fortunate to be part of it. And a lot of that will continue. If it weren't for divorce I wouldn't be taking dance lessons today or playing music and singing again or extending myself beyond what I used to do. So I owe so much to both and I'm thankful for and if she hears me wherever she is I want to thank you more than I can tell you for sharing part of your last years with me . I will never forget it and you'll always be a part of my life you both. Love you always.
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1 I keep talking to people that knew Dubose like these dancing instructors and I think the only one that notified them about the most's illness was Dubose when she was ill like I say how she called everybody. But when she passed nobody followed up and that should have been done I would think perhaps are your family or somebody. She said that she expected to hear something more it was sorry to hear about that I told her that's the first time she knew that was passed away and that's true of others.
2 sometimes when I think of Dubose I think of her as the child and her children are her parents, which I know sounds pretty weird. But she told me once that her daughter complained and wouldn't let her keep a new dog because her daughter just had a baby and she's afraid that the dog would hurt her baby. And of course Dubose would never let that happen . AND AFTER ALL THIS IS AT DUBOSE'S HOUSE NOT HER DAUGHTER'S. She couldn't even keep her own dog at her own house.So Dubose sounded pretty upset when she told me the story and she had to give up the the dog which she regretted. it was a special dog I can't remember the type thst she always wanted. usually it's the parents that tell the kids what to do but I get the feeling with her she's so nice that it's not just with her kids but in general. And when can only take so much of this. My sister was much like that too
Bottom line Dubose is being treated by your daughter and kids perhaps as if she was the kid. She was so kind and so easy on them perhaps maybe they didn't appreciate in contrast to my parents where they were definitely the bosses and they told me what to do her kids and she admitted on one another one occasion told her what to do which is really sad. They're both so kind
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Or it appeared. And so we were living out our childhoods as adults, we both agreed.
The only other person that I would think in connection with Dubose was my sister Joan who passed at age 50 now 25 years ago , hard to believe. They both had that 'path less traveled ' quality about them and child-like innocence, In a good way, that you don't see much anymore. They mostly accepted people at face value and didn't specialize in gossip. They were both very kind, animal loving, warm,humble people who rather listen to and learn from others than talk about themselves.
No doubt it was not easy for them to fit into society with such qualities you rarely see in people anymore. We were all outsiders or maybe outliers is a better word. We may not have had as many friends as others did but we valued our special kindred spirits. Yes, may I include myself here as I cannot boast being in their league but I did feel they definitely kinship to those qualities they feature And perhaps that that's why we got along so well and I'm sure my sister and Dubose would have got on well had they met
And it's interesting that those qualities transferred over into music or shall I say, we're reflected in the music,with us all enjoying the same simple soulful music from the '50s and '60s and '70s. It was the music that brought us together but there is much more than music that we had in common,. The old music reflected the old values and interests of a bygone era that we still held on to in a radically changing world where the nuclear families were bexomimg obsolete along with disaapeareing values and morals .
One specific example of the similar nature of Dubose and my sister Joan was that as nice as they both were they weren't afraid to have a little larceny in them once in awhile..
Well they both grew up being told what to do and probably no doubt tiring of that at times they weren't adverse to occasionally speaking there minds. Or just playing their thoughts. What are my sister's friends told me about the time they were out near the beach, perhaps Stinson and they wanted to go down but there were all kinds of signs to said not to but there was no reason given and there were no officials around to stop them. so my sister decided she had enough and was able to climb over a fence and get down to the beach not far beyond. And do boses case, it was recently, after having to go back to the hospital multiple times before she had been diagnosed with her untimely illness, she decided she was tired of staying overnight in the hospital when she felt fine. She didn't leave without telling him but she begged him to let her go home and there she was not only going home been walking all the way home from Kaiser miles to her home. She did leave a message for Chris who called me and we were able to find Dubose who had already walked a few miles but just before she come up to to the big release station hill so he saved her that at least. But it was humorous in a way to see Dubose speaker mind and it reminded me of my sister for many years earlier doing something similar. You want to normally expect from quote and quite nice people like to post and shown but it was nice to see them take charge to the way it wasn't really hurting anybody else.
How refreshing it was to meet people without a TV or at least that rarely watched it., people who weren't always up on the latest trends. That was Dubose with Chris.
It is sad and ironic I must say that a healthy -living person like Dubose , who was careful to eat well and take care of herself so well , would loose her life prematurely to an illness as she did.
10-27
Hi Burt, this is Louise, DuBose’s daughter. I wanted to let you know she passed away peacefully early this morning. I think she was relieved to have Bosy back with Chris, and also to have met her newest grandson, and she was able to let go. Thank you for being such a good friend to her and please feel free to share the news with others who cared for her.
10 27
Thoughts and memories of Dubose
I don't remember dates and numbers well, perhaps intentionally as I really don't care people's ages (other dates are probably more important to remember- significant dates like birth and death I probably should make better note of ) but anyway, it was three or four years ago I decided to have a meetup group to finally try to find some friends near my home in Lafayette who had my common interest of music. Playing the ukulele ,accordion most recently and keyboards I thought it would be nice to find some kindred folk who like to share old music so I signed it for 'meet up' and posted meeting and four or five or six people showed up to the first one including Dubose and Chris. I remember vividly them bringing in this long heavy keyboard around the back and and asking for a place to plug it in. It was pretty unconventional but I admired them for doing it. I would later do it myself bringing my heavy keyboard to their house when my trigger fingers went on strike And only allowed me to play the keyboard.
And it worked for a while. Turns out Chris and Dubose were really the only people I enjoyed from the meetup group and the subsequent sigalogs in my yard brought no interesting new folk really so I stopped having them after three or four sessions. But Dubose and Chris were breaths are fresh air who are open to playing all kinds of music without dominating the session like others were ,so even though I discontinued my meetup groups Dubose restarted her old sing-along she used to have before I knew her at her house and that was fun for a while until the same 'takeover' guys tried to dominate including telling me not to play the accordion. So dubose, who didn't really care for those two guys other than their talent, decided to discontinue her larger sing-alongs after a number of months and we would just have our smaller ones with as few as three or four people at her house.
Dubose would later purchase a condo at Rossmoor which I would sub rent - another long story we will have to save for another time. This would have been a fantastic place to continue the sing-alongs with my jukebox there and a dance floor for those who wanted to dance like dubois and Chris. We had a couple fun little parties there, one on New Year's with our doowop 70 special those short lived as the projector wasn't working too well. And sadly hat situation will not continue but there were many good times in between, mostly at Dubose and Chris's house in Lafayette on Las trampas and a lot of other adventures like our surf day at Napa museum and the Byron Park play along with Canaan aboard that comes to mind l. Aforementioned birthday parties and many great sing-alongs and other activities outside including concerts
☀️ Dubose fits the ultimate definition of 'friend' who is there when you need them. If she wasn't in the middle of picking up grandkids or helping someone else she was right there with a friend in need is a friend indeed.
When I had to put down Zack cat last year I didn't have anybody to go with me to the vet at the time and Dubose offered and made things a lot easier with her presence. I don't normally make a big deal out of birthdays but Dubose insisted on mine and she and Chris took me out on the exact day and we had a wonderful time I wouldn't have had otherwise. Those are just two examples of her and Chris's true friendship
I can't think of a nicer or kinder person that I've ever met in Dubose except for my of my dear sister and best friend who passed away 25 years ago of cancer. In fact I never told Dubose but she reminds me a lot of my sister. Both had that refreshing childlike innocence yet we re strong in many ways but perhaps not strong enough to be taken advantage of by certain people, which perhaps contributed to their premature demises. I know that may be a little controversial but I do believe that phrase 'the good die young' with many other examples I've noted over the years.
Dubose and my sister Joan were full of life, well educated, interesting, fun to be with and hardly a negative word from them. Onlyt when something really bothered them they would speak their mind. They were both good listeners and very easygoing with no baggage, so to speak
They both grew up with difficult home lives, typical of some during the '50s and '60s where the love was SOMETIMES on short hand . As Dubose told me many times , she may have gone overboard trying to do a lot for her grandkids cuz she WANTED to make sure they got plenty of love and attention unlike herself growing up. sHE DIDN'T want to take a chance to see them go through what she did as a child.
***DONT PUBLISh : never really got to know debussa's kids though I know she loved them but she also made a few comments to me such as when she was young Louise told her she couldn't have a certain small dog because it would bite her baby. There you go with the nice you know nice finishing last or whatever. How does a child have the right to tell his or her parents with a can do?
Another time she told me there was just one son, Gordon . who was always there for her. In fact she range for him to come west but I promising to take care of his expect a new child. Unfortunately that will happen though she did hang on amazingly to see the child one day before she passed.
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Last Correspondence
I tried to send an inspirational text or uplifting note, as possible, to Dubose everyday during her last weeks, which became months -and she wrote me back as she had strength even though I toldl her not to overdo it, as much as I enjohyed hearing from her (She always had interesting insight so say, even if difficult to take in near the end. . It was nice to have at least this texting communication since we couldn't see each other in person, understandably.
Like her beautiful name, Dubose was one of a kind, a very unique, beautiful person inside and out the likes of whom I will l probably never meet again. But she will always be around in some way to help keep me on the straight and narrow- and maybe with a few intentional slips from time to time.
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end
After Dubose
10-29
Louise, I just saw this. it was interesting that this was dubose's favorite group and song that originates exactly 60 years ago. Thought you might be interested - we sang and played it many times at our sing-alongs
Louise:
Thank you for sharing, I will have to give a listen after work. I always called her on Wednesday evenings so will at least listen to a favorite song of hers today.
Burt:
I'm sure Dubose would appreciate that. Here's a link to the song, may be a bit emotional ... That's a nice thing to do this Wednesday night. ... And keep Wednesday nights 'Dubose nights' ...
https://youtu.be/NV-qCXMwitA?si=p4C8VQg6zko7Zz5L
B
Oh, and by the way, Louise, I left the condo rent check for the past month in the yellow gift bag that may still be sitting in the hallway at the condo. And I'm sure Blake or somebody will be in touch with me about my moving from the condo as I assume you're probably going to want to sell it.
L:
Thanks. Beautiful song, but especially sad today. I will let Blake know about the gift bag and rent check. He will be handling all her financials, but yes, I think we will need to sell the condo. So sad that she never got to enjoy it, and I’m sorry that it wasn’t a longer term thing for you as well. If you have any interest in buying it you can let Blake know.
B:
Sorry to overload you with texts but I just Saw this hospice tree lighting program at rossmoor. I'd like to do something for Dubose . so the deadline is tomorrow Although you've done so much for her already but I thought you might like to see this. And for your brothers FYI
Dubose Friend Jackie at hospice tree lighting 11-3-25 at Rossmoor. Dubose name was read about others including my sister Joe and brother Don
L
That sounds like a nice idea. Please send the information. I have passed on your info to Blake and will let him reach out when he is ready.
Speaker from which those beautiful , warm sounds emanate
amplifier and receiver